And from there it builds... the scripts don't fix this... the scripts they created this...
They build it up... the mind takes it from there...
And suddenly the world is different.
I've never seen SWAT in action. Never had the desire. But i have a vivid imagination. And this morning, in the darkness they came... Through the silence I could hear sirens everywhere... men, in cars unmarked, marked, coming from everywhere with their guns and their badges, their body armor and their grim faces...
And then it was gone. washed away... washed away by the talkers...
So, if anyone has any questions about how to treat my professionals with respect, I refer you to your ethics requirements from your licensures, South Carolina State Law, Federal Law (including but not limited to HIPPA), SCDHEC, DSS, THE MEDICAL BOARD OF THE STATE OF SOUTH CAROLINA, OR IF NECCESSARY TO THE POLICE OR A COURT OF LAW.
You don't want to follow the law? Try me.
ANY QUESTIONS? ANYONE? ANYONE FROM SOUTH CAROLINA, PLEASE?
Oh, the Internist is gonna be so proud. I love to make my doctors PROUD.
Now it's brain fog. But hey, lost a lot of weight and stopped ADHD medication. Plus flashbacks of hospitals and of multiple near death experiences. My brain is tired.
So it's more of the same. Rest, mild exercise, nutrition, electrolyte water, calm app.
Do I revel in being miserable? Not quite. Seriously, you try stopping Clozaril after 21 years and see what happens. You stop retaining water, you stop wanting to eat, headaches, flashbacks, moodswings, BP changes, heart rate drops, even your body temperature is different. Slightly lower. Fatigue, nausea, tingling, twitches, tinnitus... feeling narcoleptic because you don't sleep deeply.
But seriously, if that stuff was helping, how did I manage to OD on three bottles of scripts while on a therapeutic dose? Anyone? Anyone at all?
It wasn't helping. So now the chemically suppressed memories and emotions come out and the body struggles to keep the mind together. I have to keep the body alive while the mind heals.