Even a Shrink can see

 

One big happy prismaly

Together the rest of our lives

As far as our friends were concerned

Everything seemed right

 

But that's when they told me

They said me it was time to move on

Just tired of the hospitalizations

It told me the pills were gone

And now I want to believe

want to believe it's over

Suddenly it's plain to see

They're as tired as me and

Even a shrink can see

There's nothing left between us

I knew all along something was wrong

But I did my best to deny it

And now I can't go home

I want to be alone so

Tell all the ones who are missing me that I'm alright

Even a shrink can see

There were times I had nothing

And somehow, I laughed through it all

There are moments I'll never forget

And some I wouldn't care to recall

And still, I want to believe

I want to believe it's over

Suddenly it's plain to see

They don't need me

Even a ahrink can see

There's nothing left between us

I knew all along something was wrong

But I did my best to deny it

And now I can't go home

I want to be alone so

Tell anyone who misses me that I'm alright

Even a shrink can see

 

Nothing more to talk about

It's over when it's over

In the end you both stop trying

In the end it's oh so sad

And you are crying

 

And now I can't go home

I want to be alone so

Tell anyone who misses me that I'm alright

Even a shrink can see

Won't ya tell me that I'm alright

Even a fool like me

 

Woo ooo I'm alright

Even a shrink can see

Whoa ooo ooo ooo

FDIA

     I knew there was something I had to warn Greenville County about. And it matches the history and the records and even the gossip around town. And it starts with my families. Oh, it makes perfect sense. Fictitious Disorder Imposed on Another, formerly Munchhousen's Byproxy. Imaginary illnesses. That is the danger and the waste of public money. That's the source of the endless new hospital, new center, new doctor BS. And Bipolar was the perfect foil. Vague and completely internal and invisible. Whereas FDIA can be traced to records and facts. All these hospitals with their records. They just have to connect the dots. Like IMA did. Like Mindful Upstate did. Medicalized perfection linked to psychiatric illness. I found my answers. And it's all about control. Lack of boundaries. It even explains the DID and the memory issues. Greenville County has a lack of proper boundaries around medical care. And that was taught. It actually is a problem based in reality, not some bipolar/psychosis BS. And their own damn tests prove it. They have done so many. I do believe it.

Disorders of the Mind

     On further reflection, the issues that pop up most frequently are Munchhousen's byproxy, DID, and mild autism spectrum. 

    The first because of the microanalysis of my faults, some controlling behavior, along with how publicized my health has always been. It's like my families are addicted to dissecting me. Can't leave well enough alone. Because I've spent so much time in hospitals. Because of the poor boundaries and high or moving standards. There's really so much detail to go behind this theory. That munchhousen's article lights up my brain like a fire. 

    The second because of the repeated tests of memory that come back with difficulties in recall, the testing in controlled settings, all the drugs, the docs and hospitals, the inconsistent realities, the patterns and changes in consciousness... it all adds up. 

    The third because it's been a part of the picture since the nineties and clearly explains sensory sensitivity (even the CAPD), the intelligence, and the findings from numerous professionals from springbrook to Boston to Riggs.

    But I think the missing piece is Munchhousen's byproxy (FDIA). It makes so much sense. 

Staff Meeting

    You know... I just realized I invited the wolves into the hen house. Well, I'll be interested to see what these hospitals think of thier handiwork. Y'all created me. You and Prichards. What do you think? I hear Shapiro was elected president of Riggs. I remember him. The Psychiatrist, started with an M? 

    I wonder if McLean still has clozaril man. He was on TV. Atlanta said no. Someone wasn't listening very well. Multistate clusterfuck. OK. Maybe clusterfuck is a strong word. Yeah? Yall remember discharging me that one time? I was in the er, same day? Fantastic work, fellas. I know Beth Israel Deaconess really appreciated bringing me out of that coma. Fucking clozaril. Shit'll kill you.