Nuerologist

    I waver between delusional and not so delusional, amused and not so amused. But this was kinda funny. She said to see my internist about the physical and a psychiatrist about the rest. In progress and done. Hmmm... yes... strange. Not related to VNS. Well, I didn't think so. I need to go to the library. I still question some of the life choices, but this gets tiresome. I really wouldn't isolate, but I think maybe it helps me focus. And I'm concerned. One of the old guard was at ccbh. He discharged me. Like they thought if I saw one of them, I'd simply forget what they did. No. Not quite that stupid. "Psychotic" or very much not... I'm not that stupid. I need to work on angry. Angry's a little upset. About the old guard. And their friends. Working together to keep me quiet. But, not my mess...

Journey

    So, we're on a journey. Just like Arson wanted. Human science experiment on a journey. To understand what medication can and can't do. And hopefully take clozapine off the market for good. Maybe discourage Harvard drug trials. Maybe shut down some God complexes. Maybe dismantle a cult. Welp, I drank the Kool-Aid. It's wearing off. You wonder why I'm weird? Why I'm so... hyper and tired and anxious and stuff? Well now you know. 

Forensic Psychiatrist Humor

How many Forensic Psychiatrists does it take to unscrew a DID? 

Only half the East Coast.

Dangerous

Sometimes pain is just pain. Sometimes people look at me like I'm dangerous. 

What I need is for people to understand the real danger. Prescription drugs. Doctors being too close. Because then it starts looking like racketeering. Insurance Fraud. Gambling with people's lives. Human Trafficking. Then I start thinking about Federal Agents moving in. SWAT teams. Filing reports. Social workers. Protection. Lives of crime dressed up as doctoring. Some people can't touch me now. Because I switched. I'm falling back on my accounting. My tax and audit. I have many questions. Many people do. I worry. But emotions aren't bad. Consciences aren't bad. Threats are bad. Extortion is bad. Intimidation and abuse is bad. This state has a problem. Revolving around clozapine and dirty doctors. Cleanup time is coming. 

Feet are doing better. Now it's head, face, back, sometimes digestive or respiratory. Sometimes my breathing becomes depressed. Sometimes I might stop breathing. But I'm getting rest and keeping professionals busy. Until this gets worked out.