Pressure

 I guess the problem with asking permission is that there is a pressure to say yes even when someone doesn't want to. I've been on both ends of that.

Gratitude

 

One thing that I appreciate is that people clearly care, even when they don't understand. And they seem to try harder. But lately my energy is so low and inconsistent. I get frustrated with the medical. It's difficult to make decisions, but my life seems freer.

My allergies are really wearing on me. I think i developed a sinus infection. Resting it up. I feel that I'm getting too distracted by physical symptoms. fatigue, headaches. lack of sleep. I've become somewhat nocturnal. I get anxious around people. More posts to edit... details to change.

Interpretation of a traumatic event

I remembered something about trauma. It's been said that an event that one person finds traumatic is not always interpreted the same way by others. So, differences in perspective and perception may explain the different reactions and the confusion around me. But I'm feeling better with the changes in the weather. Summer is bringing out something different. A sense of relief at last, though that doesn't mean its completely over. Waves. Moving through steps.