By Proxy

    Even without fancy names for problems like DID, Munchhausen's byproxy, boundaries, and seizures, my family will one day have to either acknowledge that what they did was wrong or they will not be in my life. It's just not possible. If they cannot respect my wellbeing, then I cannot be around them. So I'll just wait to hear from them on whether or not I can trust them to be in my life. In the meantime, I have my new healthcare team that they can't manipulate and my friends. I found my people. I just need time to further regulate my emotions and assess my cognitive limitations. With my oldest sister as next of kin. I can't figure out everything. What I do know is that the upstate health care system is rather sick of my family. And that's sad. It doesn't make sense. But I'm sure those people who are willing to change their ways can be forgiven. They have to make that choice, and live it out. As I am making mine. So with that, DID would like to thank its sponsors again...

DID would like to thank the following:

K.J. Hartwick

G Jones

PRISMA... since it's not GHS anymore. 

Mindful Upstate

IMA

Springbrook

MIP (excluding some of the old guard)

Austen Riggs Center

City Center

Mindwell

Beth Israel Deaconess

SC Governor

Medical Board

SSA

CrisisLine

DSS

My friends

My oldest sister

My nieces and nephews

Anmed

My current Docs

I still strongly suggest that everyone exercise extreme caution around my biological family and around Woodruff Road. I'm going to go with no opinion on Belmont. Healthcare by proxy. Ain't life a bitch. 

Ennywaze...

Ennywaze, I hope you've enjoyed my crazy. I have to slow down, have better boundaries and take care of myself now. I need to control my anger. Maybe sue a psychiatrist, free of undue influence. Find my own peace. A black widow. That kinda thing. Get rid of these Munchhausen like, bipolarized psychociations. I'm going to keep working on improving my recall, socializing, and try to write some fiction. Just exercise caution around Italians and also around woodruff road.

Thanks

Memory Cohesion Study (NIH)

"Collective memory is inherently selective (Rajaram and Pereira-Pasarin, 2010; Hirst and Echterhoff, 2012). When people recall the past some details are retrieved while other fail to enter into conversation. The consequence of those items not retrieved has become of increasing interest in understanding how distinct memories become increasingly similar across individuals."

    So, if person A remembers his childhood one way but is too close to B, C and D, He may have trouble remembering his childhood because the group creates a myth of what his life was like, when it really was nothing like that. They may have a narrative for who he is and what he does, even down to dictating where he lives, who his health care providers are, what his DX is, what his meds are, What his treatment plan is, he'll have no privacy and no respect and no life, but it'll look medically perfect until the strain breaks the system. Which may be why so many medical professionals believe that my family is harmful to my wellbeing. Maybe. 

    I suppose that could change. 

Thing is, every time i talk to them they're indocrinating me. Which is why we don't talk. Because its not real. They don't actually know me. I'm definitely not whoever they say I am. Im just some disabled guy. Who tried too hard. Now his liver is half shot, he cant recall, his life is empty, and he has trouble with routines and sequences of tasks. I need someone to know the real me. That's why I firewalled "my women" and the PA. So I can remember and not burn out. 

So, to use my social worker skill, hopefully my FAMILIES will keep thier noses out of my life, MIND THIER OWN BUSINESS, and stop being so incredibly CONTROLLING. It's been incredibly unhelpful. Multistate clusterfuck unhelpful.

Memory Cohesion Study

I've been reading a research paper on memory cohesion, but among individuals in a community.

Memory Cohesion Study