Orientation

    I'm trying to orient to my new reality. The one in which MIP thinks I'm a drug addict and we keep moving dx's around. I mean, they're just labels. But I'm finding that this whole remote thing is working better for me. I show up only when absolutely necessary, and they don't have to fuss and freak so much. I just do the check in's, I look for work, I do the healthy eating at home (much more possible), I do the meds by myself so long as walgreens manages to not **** up... everything is groovy. I ignore symptoms I can't make sense of, like weird headaches, body sensations, that thing with my left shoulder that the internist couldn't figure out with the bumps... I reduce expenses, I go lean... I try to exercise and get more sleep, take very careful care of my sinuses. I stay positive. 

    It's my new reality. Broke, stuck with disability, not likely to hold a job at the rate I'm going, but still trying. Trying to get adsense with the program. Trying to keep my meds filled, waiting for those tax refunds... keeping positive and running my life on a shoestring budget, hoping the price of groceries doesn't go up, letting the cat keep an eye on me. 

    Walgreens needs to update their systems. Some of the communications are patently false. Which is part of how I ended up in the ER begging for a prescription. I'm stuck with the meds. I have to take them. The labels have been independently confirmed multiple times, so unless you guys have a new idea, maybe we stop trying to force a round Bipolar on a square DID? Just sayin'...

    It was really interesting meeting that patient observer. She was really nice. Told me this story. She broke up with her boyfriend, he shot the kids and grazed her with a bullet before lying them side by side and shooting himself. She survived. Ain't that F*ed. Some story. She started in the kitchen but they decided she was too valuable and had her start working with patients. Name started with an O. She looked maybe a few years older then me. First she said she wasn't married, then she's married but they are rather independent, do their own things but together. Sounds like they have their personal space worked out. It took me a while to start to talk to her. Nurse graduated Clemson. Barely spoke but she was nice. 

    I didn't know what to expect from Dr. Darcy this time. She was quiet. It was the most routine ER visit I've ever had. There seemed to be one man in pain. I didn't want to rock the boat so I kept to myself. 

    Reminded me of the time I showed up to the ER asking if I was manic. Dr. W. Said no, you're not manic you're depressed. A patient tried to come in my room and I practically flew to the opposite wall.