Recovery

    I'm still working on reducing expenses and finding a job. I'm going to have to write off the business startup expenses as a loss. Managing my health takes too much of my time to run a real business. I'm going to try some food delivery if I can manage my driving anxiety. Ever since the doctor quit and I had that accident, I don't like driving so much. If it's a familiar area and traffic isn't bad I'm ok. Plus I need new glasses before I drive a lot. Unless I use the contacts, but I can't use those much. Hopefully soon, I'll have a new job. 

    Between the anxiety and the lack of income, it's not been great. Of course, the THC products were great for anxiety, but the hospital doesn't see it that way. So they prescribed something. As soon as I can fill it... should be easier. I guess they feel better when they have total control. It's been hard to get the meds filled on time though. The insurance puts up road blocks or I run out of refills or the pharmacy is out. I just hope I get a job soon. I need some income and I don't feel great about driving a lot. I can't afford an accident and I'm not as sharp as I used to be. 

    I'm told some things are permanent. I've felt rather helpless in recent years. It's frightening when you can't keep up. Used to be I was a little behind the pack. Now it's not even close. I'm in my forties and in the same career/financial position as someone in their 20s. It's really sad. You can only pretend so much until the truth becomes obvious. Down right depressing. I've pushed the limits of the medication so hard that the doctors threaten to quit. It's just ridiculous. 

    So now I'm focusing on minimizing my expenses. I'm trying to cut them to the absolute bone. I still have some progress to make on that. It's the only way to make sure that I don't become homeless. I just didn't realize it was this bad. I thought I could still catch up. They're telling me that's not realistic.