Loyalty

    Loyalty means sticking it out when times are tough. Loyalty means having the courage to point out other people's mistakes or misjudgments in tactful ways to help them do better, not blindly aiding them to commit errors. Loyalty is not blind obedience. Loyalty means being loyal to what a person stands for, not necessarily what they do. Standing by them while calling them out is more loyal than helping a person to make mistakes. 

        Being firm about boundaries is actually a service to another person, even if they cannot see that. When they realize they were wrong, they will be grateful if they are worth keeping. If they never realize they were wrong, or don't have the ability to forgive a misunderstanding, then they were never worth keeping.

    A wise man makes decisions based on facts, not a lack of information. Thus, a wise man sometimes must consider that he doesn't know all the facts, and therefore a wise man makes decisions based on the facts he does not know but can infer from situational factors. Further, a wise man does not speak when he does not know all the facts. 

    Even the most educated man can act the fool. All it takes is some misplaced assumptions and the heat of passion, or simply a lack of good judgement. I have known many educated men to do many foolish things and say many foolish things, despite having very high placed degrees. Having letters after your name does not make you invincible.

Restraint and Humility

    I think Restraint and Humility go hand in hand. I think strength without good judgement is worthless. Restraint means being able to do something but choosing not to do it. It is easy to hurt someone. It takes restraint and humility to hold back the words or the hand that does the actual harm. It takes humility to recognize that harm is not wise. Maybe only a fool would have walked back into that emergency room. A small man might have said something ugly to Dr. Darcy when he had the chance. Or even been violent. I feel like I exercised restraint and humility. It takes a bigger person to turn away from the past. It takes a bigger person to forgive. I did not feel like that first ER visit was handled well. I called that ambulance for a reason. The Spravato did not check my vitals before releasing me. My heart rate surged. Cold and clammy. I justifiably thought I might be dying. Weak and faint. I called for a reason. It was just nice to see a different response this time.